it had to be you

I sit staring out of my study window orange greens browns golds brown pine needles everywhere no women to be seen my lover of 4 years nearly 5 gone to follow fishwrap that fishwrap, the cute little screamer gone too and the stoic spartan warrior woman “I don’t know how to respond to you anymore”Continue reading “it had to be you”

mine own hands

She came on like gangbusters starfire melding in me disintegrated as fast as suddenly hands mouth a wincing smile her clear clear clear blue eyes doubled no coupling leaving a remarkable knowing            she’s gone i fell in love with that look all over all over all over empty this timeContinue reading “mine own hands”

Hope, Despair and the Right to Die with Dignity 101

“It never occurred to me until this storm day, while swinging inthe wind, that trees are travelers, in the ordinary sense,” John Muir’s A Wind-Storm In the Forests, Mountains of California (Muir, 1894)

calm down

When my mother was dying from cancer in 2008, my dad told me that there were 22 others living on Trailwood Avenue who were positive for some type of cancer concurrently. “There’s a lawsuit,” I told my dad. We were driving and it was warm outside and the air smells like Central California does inContinue reading “calm down”

White Privilege Systemic Eradication of the Other

I missed my trauma therapy appointment for the 3rd week in a row today and it’s showing through the cracks of my face, my hands, my mouth, my eyes, my voice… is cracking. My primary diagnosis nowadays is Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and so I wondered that my experienced childhood trauma has been exceeded byContinue reading “White Privilege Systemic Eradication of the Other”